america! f- yeah!

i set out to make a yellow ribbon wreath today.  i have been absolutely crazy person obsessed with making one for a few days.  i don’t know why i feel like this is my patriotic duty before my husband leaves, but i just HAD to make one.  i gave up some precious nap time today to do it too, so you know that i was serious about it.  anyway, here is a tutorial on how i created said masterpiece. 

supplies:
1 foam wreath from a craft store or the walmarts $5
1 pack of floral pins $1
2 clusters of red, white, and blue fake carnations $1.94
1 pair of acu pants that you can cut up (i am assuming anyone interested in making this wreath has a pair of acu pants laying around with the crotch torn out or the knees a mess)

step 1: cut the legs out of acus essentially turning them into britney spears style acu pattern daisy dukes.
you should have enough material to make a wreath and go to halloween as a “slutty private”.  double win.

step 2: cut the legs into 1.5 (ish) inch strips.  next, cut the strips into 1 (ish) inch chunks. as you can tell this a very precise science.

step 3: pin the acu chunks in the middle with a floral pin and stick the acu chunks into the foam wreath.  repeat until the whole wreath is covered.  (i chose not to do the sides of the wreath too 1. because my daughter kept stepping on my wreath and 2. because i *may* or may not have stabbed myself at least 13 times already)

step 4: once the whole wreath is covered, take the carnations off of the stems and stick the floral pin into the green part and stab that puppy into the wreath too. 

step 5: arrange them two beside each other in the red, white, and blue pattern.  america!, f- yeah!

viola! you, my friend, have just made yourself one kick ass wreath. 

you might notice that i don’t actually have a yellow bow on my yellow ribbon wreath.  i bought the wrong ribbon because i was in a hurry and so my wreath is yellow ribbonless. whatever.  i actually think that the yellow would have clashed with my america carnations.  (honestly, i thought that silk red, white, and blue flowers were a bit of an urban legend, or at the very least could only be bought in alabama or my home state of mississippi.  but now i can’t think of one thing that i shouldnt put red, white, and blue silk carnations on.  i mean really.  they are AWESOME).

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