this morning was spent cleaning the catastrophe level 7 playroom. see… the kids have lots of toys and lots of toys that have lots of parts. when the small people have lots of time, they pull out lots of toys and throw lots of the pieces of the lots of toys onto the floor. and mommy gets to spend lots of time losing her sanity on getting two people with an attention span shorter than a gnat to pick up all the little pieces. OR mommy gets the gnats to pick up the big stuff and mommy spends lots of time picking up lots of pieces to lots of toys and putting them back into their bins.
today I devised a plan that surely has me as the front runner for some sort of a trophy. I put all the little pieces into ziploc bags and put the ziploc bags into a Tupperware bin and put the Tupperware bin on top of the entertainment center. now, when they wanna play zoo or palace or dinosaurs or Legos, they have to come get me. I will empty out the contents of the bag when and only when the contents of the last bag are cleaned up. what!what! mommy for the win!
and guess what? it even works. I even think they like it better because they can actually enjoy using all the pieces of each toy.
BUT before I could even pat myself on the back, c and j wanted me to get them a juice. I stupidly told them that they could have juice with their lunch. only I didn’t check to make sure we had juice first that’s a rookie mistake and I should have known better. new mommies: please learn from my mistakes. save yourselves!
usually my drama child is king j himself, but today c was the one who was p-ih-ih-issed. she told me “you are not my mommy!” in a fit of 1 year old rage. (seriously. she has 12 years to practice this before she’s a teenager. I’m afraid, y’all.) meanwhile, I’m slaving over her culinary masterpiece of microwave corndog and canned peaches. how dare she? and furthermore, where do they even learn this stuff?
that return trip back down to earth was quick. see? not even hour of every day can be a victory. hey, lady in the store whose kid just los’ they mind. you are not alone. hey, mom who made chicken nuggets for lunch. you are not alone in your nutritional prowess. YOU.ARE.NOT.ALONE.
for now, c calmed down and is napping. j is laying quietly in the bed. I’m going to go come up with some kind-of an outdoor activity for the kids when they wake up.
wish me luck…
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