buh-byyyyeee ba-bobbsey twin

buh-byyyyeee ba-bobbsey twin!
(or the far more likely lipoma or cyst)

tomorrow is my surgery. let me break out the truth baton for a minute:

when holding the truth baton one must always tell the truth. damnit

truth: I’m a little worried about it. well, the anesthesia part and the maybe pain part.

reason 1: i had a heart thing years ago. anesthesia worries me because of it.

reason 2: even though i have a high pain tolerance, i am not into the weird tugging sensation when you’re numb, but being cut. I’ve had 2 csections… I know what I’m talking about here, folks.

I know it’s just like a wisdom tooth surgery or even a colonoscopy, but I don’t recall either of those involving stitches, shaving your head, or your skull.

I’m not sure that I’ve ever had “twilight” anesthesia. I definitely didn’t have it for my wisdom teeth. the oral surgeon just filled up my mouth with cotton balls and bullets to bite on when the pain got too intense. that’s only a half joke. (the oral surgeon seriously gave me no laughing gas or anything through a mask, IV, or otherwise and I’m allergic to Novocain which he didn’t find out until he’d already started and he couldn’t give me my other two rounds of shots. he gave me some other kind of pain shot at the end, but i’d already been through the surgery and it was just for the drool factor at that point. it.was.horrible)

anyway, I think twilight sedation what they gave me for my heart surgery, but I do remember parts of that. I really have no hopes of remembering parts of this.

also, have I mentioned that they’re going to have to shave part of my head? I have long hair so it’s cool, but I’m thinking I might get some colored clip in weave just for sport. I’ve always wanted to try it out- this seems like as good a time as any. I’m thinking pink like Effie Trinket. Yes?

if y’all are thinking about me tomorrow morning… I’d appreciate a little prayer, or a positive thought.

I promise it’s really not a big deal, but having any kind of surgery- no matter how small- with my husband in another country is kinda freaking me out.

also, I’m joking about it being my absorbed twin… obviously. but that really does happen. if this lump that I’ve had for 30 years turns out to be something that could have potentially ever had a social security number, I’ll probably need someone to drive me to the nearest psych ward. mmmmkkk?


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