today at c’s ballet class I witnessed mom shaming at it’s worst and it’s been gnawing at me ever since.
c takes a ballet class for 2 – 4 year olds. when she started she was about 2 years and 1 month old and all knees and no “listening ears.” thankfully the teachers were really patient with her and helped her learn the routine inside the classroom. it only took a few lessons for her to catch on and have herself a grand old time.
similarly, c’s class got a brand new 2 year old in it last week. last class was their halloween party so sweet little a (we shall call her) was only in class about 10 minutes of actual dancing and off they went to party. she did fine last week, but this week she was a little distracted. I certainly wouldn’t say a was being bad, but she was wandering off from the group and kinda doing her own thing. the teacher seemed completely unshaken and would gently remind her to come on back to the group. no.big.deal. a’s mom was getting frustrated though as, obviously, everyone wants their kid to behave. she was going to the door and telling a “get back in line” and “be a good listener” but with such a tone that the underlying message was a “GET BACK IN LINE OR I’M FIXING TO TEAR YOUR BOTTOM UP!” a’s mom was stressed.
there are about 6 chairs in a row outside the classroom. I was sitting on the far left, a’s mom was in the middle, and ahole mom (not to be confused with a’s mom) was on the far right.
ahole mom took a’s moms meltdown as an opportunity to pat herself on the back but underhandedly insulting a’s mom. loudly. for all to hear. ahole mom said “I’m sooooooooooo glad we waited to start e in ballet until she was 3 years old. I just feel like she could listen soooo much better because she was a little older. I’d just die of embarrassment if e was the one causing distractions in class. I’d.just.die” and then she giggled her post-nasal drip little giggle like she was the funniest person on the earth.
hold up, ahole. hoooolllddd up. first of all, you’re a bitch. straight up. second of all, I’m pretty sure if it was baby baryshnikov train-ups and they were worried about distractions they wouldn’t let 2 year olds in the class. there is a reason they let 2 year olds in with 3 year olds and it’s certainly not to distract from your child’s obvious auditions for Annie on Broadway that we all didn’t know was going on during the same class where 3 year olds are hovering in corners pooping in their pants. get friggin’ real. little girl a isn’t disturbing, she’s being a 2 year old… which incidentally could be your 3 year old just being a 3 year old next week. I may sneak e a pixie stick and some Mountain Dew before class just to ensure it is her kid so she can see what it feels like. so there.
poor a’s mom was all “maybe I should have waited til she was a little older” and I said to her “this is only her second class. C was a complete spazz when she started, it takes some getting used to. she’ll be great! you totally started her at the right time” in an effort to undo some of the ugly that was spewing from the nasally voiced ahole trying to make her feel bad.
I don’t know if I made a difference in a’s mom’s feelings this morning but I am seriously still appalled at ahole’s straight-up mom shaming. she wasn’t even trying to hide it. she just let her bitchy all hang out. that’s worse than putting glitter on a pimple. bold ahole. bold. it was obvious to anyone with half a brain (which I can neither conform or deny that ahole has) that a’s mom was already having a hard time and was upset. why not kick a lady when she is down?
I don’t know if you can tell but I got pretty fired up by this whole thing. I do not, can not, won’t not understand why moms can’t just flipping be supportive of one another. there is no reason why this lady needed to chime in with her two cents. the only purpose of her unsolicited commentary was to make a’s mom feel bad. which she already did. talk about rubbing salt in a wound.
can’t we moms just freaking support one another?
ahole served herself up a big ole dollop of karma today. I just pray that the target gods have a’s mom wheeling around the corner right when ahole is eating the big shit sandwich she fixed herself today and scooping Madame perfect 3 year old up off the floor… you know because magically at 3 they no longer pitch fits, right? if I just so happen to be at target then too, I totally wouldn’t mind and I could probably manage to have my iPhone handy for photographic evidence.
but really! can’t we support one another? moms are just doing the best they can. I can say that pretty much goes across the board. if you have to be the constant winner of a competition (by putting others down intentionally) that nobody even knew they were participating in, you might need a shrink. if you think it’s appropriate to say that anyone else’s child’s behavior would literally cause you death right in front of their mom, you might need a shrink. if you think it’s funny to hurt people’s feelings, you need a shrink and Jesus. but definitely get with Jesus first. he doesn’t have a copay.