halloween is in 5 days, but i live in colorado springs and it straight up DNGAF about weather by the calendar so we are having ourselves a proper snow storm til wednesday.
since i am stuck in the house sitting by the fire, i am thinking about all the christmas things. and all the things i shall buy myself on black friday. black friday is for me- the month of december is for everyone else. i ain’t even sorry. only God can judge me.
this year at the recommendation of friends and trial and error, i have discovered quite a running list of things i cannot live without. i might be 36 and have 4 kids, but i think i finally figured out how to take care of myself. if you are shy about things underwear – i highly suggest you look away now.
first things first. my $14 amazon bra that is gonna make you feel like the queen you are. i have to buy curvy plus size because of my chest melons, but they also have not big titty bitch size.
i nursed my kids for a solid, collective 60 months. one of my boobs looks like a tennis ball at the end of a tube sock. the other one is cool. but, these bras make both of my boobs look like a carefree kid-less lady. these bras are also lace and pretty and COMFORTABLE- like don’t fling it off the minute i walk in my house comfortable. after wearing comfortable but bras that look like i should be in a nursing home for months upon months, i call that a WIN. seriously, it’s $14. try the nude. they also have sassy colors like red and blue. don’t worry, you’ll be back and ready to be festive af under your sweaters for christmas.
what could be better than buying a thong that makes your butt look like a straight up peach and cost less than a single buffalo wing? honestly, there really isn’t much. i think there is a country song about walmart lingerie and i am vehemently against country music but i am fully team walmart thongs. i do workout, but i will take every little ounce of help i can get in the not grossing myself out in the full length mirror department. so, check these thongs out for 50 cent. make november the month you break up with panty lines.
we have our undergarments squared straight away. let’s move on to this dress that is gonna make you feel like marilyn monroe stole your figure. i recommended it on facebook about a year ago and all the people who bought it agreed. so, i am recommending it again. i wear it every time i have had an emotional relationship with sodium and dairy. this dress does not care that you are bloated up like a tick. this dress only cares that some skilled craftsman in china made this dress perfect for your dime-ass body… and don’t you dare think anything else about yourself.
the links here might be a little sloppy, but i have been a stay at home mom for 8 years and i was trying to do one handed HTML coding because one of my offspring was making like a sloth with my left arm. the nosy kids also got a kick out of my underwear posts.
i have a few more things that i will be recommending soon to make you feel put together with minimal effort but it’s sunday and i have to put these humans to bed even though i don’t think they’re actually going to have school tomorrow.
Meagan Drew with Drew on Paper is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com.