distancing day 17/sip day 5 thoughts:

Today was a rollercoaster. Not like a Six Flags rollercoaster where it’s scary, but you’re almost certain you won’t die. I’m talking the kinda rollercoaster built by 3 toothed carnies with a meth problem and seatbelts held together by electrical tape.

The kids’ first unofficial lesson of the day was the art of panicked cleaning in the 20 minutes before someone comes over. What I thought was a zoom call, turned into a google meetup in my pea brain. I looked around and saw strawberry tops from breakfast, pillows and blankets and TLC only knows what else all over our everything. At 820, I let the kids know they were going to be dialing into a call from what I assumed were different rooms (so no audio overlap) and everyone in school couldn’t know how nasty we are on a regular basis. Spoiler alert: it was simply an audio call. More on that in a moment…

School started at 9 and there were tears by 903. I tried to connect to the audio morning announcements we had frivolously panic cleaned for. We did connect, but I could not for the love of Steve Jobs figure out how to mute my mic. Laurel was immediately displeased upon waking and I didn’t think the principal would appreciate Laurel serenading her and everyone listening with the ballad “it’s not faiiiirrrr.” The Drews disconnected and we jumped into work. Everyone was immediately confused. I am a paper and pen gal despite my best efforts to the contrary. I called myself making the kids a checklist of all the things they needed to do, but there was work hiding in every Google crack and crevice for them and, surprisingly, the kids don’t like it when I tell them “but wait, there’s more!” It took us round about 4 hours but (I think) we got everything done. Marian still needs to read with me and we will do that tonight. It was too too too much to try and ask her to concentrate after our marathon morning.

This afternoon I had to run some things to Jerry’s office staff duty. As I live and breath, there is not a day that goes by that I don’t embarrass myself even when I can’t even see people! I’m wearing workout clothes and I have no pockets. My hands were full-ish and I had to open 2 doors to get into Jerry’s building. I *thought* I had Lysol wipes in my van, but of course I didn’t. Never fear! I had ziploc bags. I stuck a ziploc bag in my bra for the return trip, gloved up my right hand, went in, and dropped my load. The staff duty officer asked me if I’d like a Clorox wipe or hand sanitizer for the doorknobs on the way out and I reached into my bra, whipped out my yellow ziploc bag, held it in the air, and proudly exclaimed “NO THANKS! I BROUGHT MY OWN PROTECTION!” Why am I like this?

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