Hey there sports fans! It’s everybody’s favorite day of the week. F-U Friday!
1. The morning started as all Friday mornings start: with a couple cage matches and ended with UFC 249. Sorry I didn’t get the word out so you could PayPerView in time, but the card changed to just kid 1 vs kid 2. There were no winners. I still don’t understand how they can even really know it’s Friday, but they wake up and get straight to the bullshit. I also don’t know how you can have so much disdain for someone without so much as a cup of coffee, but I don’t pretend to understand these kids.
2. The kids wanted the amazing 5- minute artisan bread for breakfast so we made it. I feel like I’m at a real crossroads in my life where one path has this bread recipe and one path has skinny jeans. I haven’t decided which way I’m going yet, but if this coronatine goes on much longer the path may be chosen for me. Clara is my main yeasty (Shakespeare not Urban dictionary adjectivity) child and helper in the kitchen. Laurel and Marian pitched in today too. I would have taken pictures but my kitchen is a cat 5 shithole because we use more dishes than my dishwasher can handle in a day’s work. Tonight is pizza nighhhhtttt and pizza dough needed to also be made. My big bread bowl was still dirty and my dough recipe is sorta like the loaves and the fishes, so I halved it. This is going somewhere, I promise. Obviously, we mathed it up halfing recipes and stuff except with 2/3 cup stumped me. Y’all. I asked Alexa what 1/2 of 2/3rds cup was. 1/2 of 2/3rds. Why are they letting me have any part in these people’s education again?
3. Winnie Winter had an eventful day today. She went over to her bells 2x all by her big girl self and tried to ring them. She mostly looked like she was the mascot for the Third Reich with her goose stepping little feet. My level of concern about these practices will either increase greatly or fade off depending on the results of the genetic testing. Speaking of genetic testing, I found a dog identifier app and have been running data – I think obsessively would be a good word. Not that it matters one bit, but I am so curious to see what she’s going to look like when she grows up. The most common results are: Australian Cattle Dog, Jack Russell Terrier, Border Collie, Australian Shepherd, Rat Terrier, English Pointer, and Brittany. I imagine she is is just a perfectly perfect mutt. If she is even .01% Brittany- prepare yourselves for “it’s Brittany, bitch” to be hackneyed even more than it already is in no time. WiWi also had her first run-in with goatheads tonight and she was pitiful. I pulled them out as fast and I could and stuck them to my pants. I may be forced to carry her like feet-bound Chinese royal court for the rest of her life because I can’t have my heart broken like that again.
4. Now we are eating pizza and watching Cats because the dog can’t be the only one who was tortured today.