distancing day 51 thoughts:

Today is another day where I have no idea where it went. I looked at the clock at 1 and 4 and poof! the day was gone.

1. The kids and I went for a little joy ride this morning. All roads took us to Dunkin and who were we to deny all roads? I have been really impressed at how fast food is handling things and haven’t been anywhere where they weren’t wearing masks sand gloves… most places you even have to swipe your own card so they’re not touching those. I left a tip today which was a little awkward because they were like “you wanna do this?” and even though I planned to give 20% for a split second I thought “how could I be like “nah, buddy.” Back to DD, I ordered an apple fritter at Dunkin but what I got is a honey bun. I didn’t even know they made those! I took one bite and I let it fall out of my mouth like a baby trying peas for the first time. You can probably tell by looking at me, but I am NOT a picky eater. I do have some texture things though and that honey bun crossed and assaulted every texture thing I had and invented some new ones. I have cold chills just thinking about it 11 hours later. The meme of Tim Gunn doing yuck is me and I him.

2. The mattress that I bought with my Trump bucks arrived today. I haven’t ever seen anything like it! The whole king size mattress was in a box the size of a 2 -24 packs of coke! It was vacuum sealed and it blew up like the Michelin man the second we punctured the plastic. It was double boxed which I suppose prevented a mattress explosion in the FedEx plane upon the plastic having an incident. The double boxes masqueraded as a submarine, rocket ship, playhouse, dog den, fortress, lego table, a “solitude box” (Jack’s words), and who knows what else. I love kids’ imagination! I also love them leaving me alone and letting me clean the laundry room that so desperately needed a good scrubbing.

3. Winnie would NOT walk today. Every time we took her out the heckin wind sent her running right back home. Um. You live in Colorado doggie child. There will be snow. There will be rain. There will be heat. There will be gloom of night. If the US Postal Service can deliver mail in it, you can walk in it. I tried bringing Jack. I tried bringing Clara. She wasn’t interested. She would play some games with her canned chicken tonight though so we were able to wear her out some. We put chicken under a plastic mug with a handle and she had to figure out how to get the mug off the chicken. It didn’t take her more than a couple minutes, but you could just see her puppy wheels a turning. Now my whole house smells like Costco canned chicken as she pretty much mopped the floor with chicken juice. Remember what I said about being nose blind to our family brew? Yeah. I don’t really mind not being constantly assaulted with canned chicken scent. Again, Tim Gunn. Even though she wouldn’t walk , she would walk about 5 feet out of our gate to take a field trip to a sandy spot for digging. I don’t want her digging in our yard, but she’s gonna dig. She can dig in the sand right outside our fence and I can cover it right back up instead of ruining our grass or our dirt slab where grass is supposed to be.

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