1. We are getting close to 100 days of distancing. Clara has designated herself the party planner for the social distancing 100 days party. It will just be us and maybe our bubble people. Clara is fired up about party planning and I’m no George Banks so ask and she shall receive… except ponies. We aren’t zoned for ponies. If you get that reference give yourself 4 crisis school spelling test As.
2. This morning I felt like that Shaquille O’Neal gif where he’s swatting at everything- but instead of drama or negativity it was orange juice, finding the iron, helping Laurel get “morning clothes,” etc etc etc but all at once 12 seconds after my feet hit the floor. I ended up redownloading Siri so I could make her do some of the heavy lifting. She may or may not know where the iron is, but I can send people to find her to ask her and that gets them away from me so my brain can boot up before I have 6853 browsers open all at once.

3. Today was a hot one, but beautiful. We broke out the water slide and had a grand old time once we got stakes that worked. The plastic ones that came with the water slide weren’t going into the ground and they were snapping off at the top. I had to run to the BX (Walmart for Military only) and get new metal ones. Without fail, every time I put up the water slide, I hit my knuckle on my index finger at least one good wallop with the sledge hammer. Today was no exception. If there are excessive typos in my blog tonight, blame the freakishly large Mickey Mouse pointer finger. It doesn’t always go where I tell it to.
4. I priced out homeschool curriculum tonight for the Drewlings. Holy Smokes! I knew it wasn’t cheap but I didn’t realize just how expensive it was! I haven’t committed to anything because I’m still trying to figure out what the year holds, but these COVID numbers aren’t doing me any favors. Colorado is doing well, comparatively, but it’s still a disease we know truly little about. I guess my biggest beef is that if wearing masks and social distancing is the safest way to do school, then I don’t see how that can work. I cannot imagine putting that on a teacher too. They have enough to worry about in a day without adding in mask slingshot monitoring and sneeze police. Good gravy. Colorado recently cut the schools’ funding too, so let’s definitely make everyone do more with less resources. All us parents now definitely KNOW that our kids are NOT always (re: hardly ever) a joy to teach. Teachers need to be given raises on raises and swag bags daily, at the least. I’m not talking swag bags with some Dollar Tree pencils. I’m talking so many sharpies they’re single use, a bouquet of Ticonderoga self sharpening pencils, dry erase markers in colors only spiders naturally see, a barista and massage chair in every teacher’s lounge… The. WORKS. Let’s not take all their money (and then tell them they have less resources) but they got a bunch of kids that were crisis schooled by half brained nitwits that ain’t carried a one since the Reagan administration for the whole last trimester. Yes, I’m even talking about me here, but it was Clinton not Reagan. I’m a spring chicken. On top of all that other stuff: keep the kids 6 feet apart, well sanitized, and with a mask on their face at all times. How’s that gonna work? I’m here to tell you it isn’t. Teachers are miracle workers, but even that is a bridge too far.