distancing day 104 thoughts:

1. After the pencil sharpening drama this AM, I completely understand the appeal of the Ticonderoga pencil. I really, really do. Every pencil in our whole house decided to have a graphite malfunction. We had pencil leads falling slap out of sharpened pencils, pencils breaking in half, pencils with erasers chewed off. There were a few arguments about pencil ownership thrown in for good measure. Mommy school is gonna have a bouquet of Ticonderoga pencils and the kids are going to have to turn in their most prized possession to borrow one. They can have their possessions back when they return the pencil with lead, shaft, and eraser in tact. This is serious, y’all. The pencil theatrics were too much. Teachers don’t deserve that. We settled on crayons by the end of the school sesh and one of the kids insisted that the scrolly up crayons belong to her. I said “Jesus, Joseph, and Mary with the fighting!” and Clara deadpan retorted “really it’s just Mari.” She’s right. Jesus and Joseph weren’t fighting about crayons at all- at least not at my house.

2. We had hail tonight that looked like Sonic ice falling from the sky. Pregnant Meagan circa 2015 would have been outside with a bucket trying to catch it all. Meagan that bought a car less than 6 months ago just stayed cringing during the entire storm. It’s not unusual for us to have hail storms in Colorado in June/July, but it’s always weird to see ice on the ground when it’s hot as Satan’s buttcrack outside. We just cleaned out the garage so that if we have bad weather we could pull both of the vehicles in, but then we didn’t give ourself enough warning. I haven’t fully inspected the cars but I think the sonic ice left us mostly unscathed except for a sudden and intense desire for Cherry Limeaids.

3. Clara and I went to do a curbside Old Navy pickup this afternoon. While we were out, we ran into Mardel to look for more educational games. We bought a game called “Pet Me” for division facts the other day and it was such a big hit/kids of all levels friendly, that I decided I needed more. According to the UPS website, our curriculum is in Denver. I would guess it’ll be here in a day or two and I can’t wait to dig in. Everything looked intuitive and fun on their website, but I’m really excited to take a look at it all and figure out ways to make it even more fun. I already do a dance pretty much every time my kids get an answer right. They tell me it’s embarrassing (and it probably would be if anyone not related to us saw me), but their smiles tell me they appreciate my enthusiasm. My very scientific research indicates that the Roger Rabbit is the dance move most likely to elicit a response. Ya know. Just in case anyone needs that information for the future.

4. The little girls have been wanting someone to sit in their room at night until they fall asleep. I normally wouldn’t care too much but I HAVE BEEN WITH THEM FOR 104 STRAIGHT DAYS. I don’t need to watch them fall asleep at night too. I would like to watch my own self fall asleep. Ok. I don’t even know what that means but you know what I mean.

5. My friend asked me to go out to grab some food tonight. We didn’t end up going because it was raining Sonic, but I realized when she asked that I have only 1 pair of pants that fit and I don’t know where they are right now. One would think I’d take better care of my singular COVID 19 pants, but there’s like a lot of laundry at this house, youse guys. Old Navy curbside pick up to the rescue. I am officially ickied out by myself for real for real now though. I can’t keep on like this – if for no other reason than my skin stretching is making me itchy as heck. It’s like a frantic itchy too, not a polite one. After my Old Navy curbside today, I have 3 pairs of pants that fit. I’m a firm believer in buying clothes that actually fit you even if you don’t like the size that they are. I also know that these pants are not EVER going to Goodwill because you never know when there will be a global pandemic that shuts down the entire country and all there is to do is eat. It’s best I leave them in the dark recesses of my closet for future pandemic needs. Until I lose some weight, I will be wearing pretty much the same thing every day. Y’all just pretend it’s cause I’m like those ultra successful people who wear the same thing every day to save their decision making brain power for more important things and not just cause I am a chubster that’s too cheap to buy more than three pairs of pants to see her through this difficult time.


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