1. In the interest of full disclosure: my emotions were all over the place today. I am so freaking tired of not being able to do anything with my kids really besides go on a walk- which they’re real real tired of. I feel guilty because I have gone in to stores that weren’t exactly necessary a few times (even though I’ve distanced and worn my mask). I feel tired because even though I do not entertain my kids all day, I have to manage them all day and they’re all over the place emotionally too. I feel excited and anxious about starting school for my kids. I’m sad for people I know who are sick. I’m frustrated with people and politics. I’m thankful for all the family time we have had. I’m disappointed in my own health habits. I’m not ok, but I’m ok. Mostly I’m just over it all, but it doesn’t change anything so what do I do with that? I assume this is what kids feel like when their parents are trying to keep them safe but it’s not fun. Only I’m the judge, jury, and defense all-in-one for myself. Being a grown up is crap. Being a grown up in a pandemic is super crap.
2. It rained and rained today. We get a PA announcement when there is lightening within 5 miles. We never did get one, which was strange since there was a lot of hail damage and tornados. A couple minutes in to the storm, the girls wanted to play in the rain, so I said go for it. It’s not like we are going anywhere. They put on their rain boots, raincoats all tucked up over their hair, bike helmets and they road all over. They were laughing so much and it just sounded like childhood. It made my heart so happy.
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