distancing day 126 thoughts:

1. I caught a glimpse of myself in a full length mirror today when I didn’t know a full length mirror was coming into my viewpoint. It’s not good, folks. It’s not good. I have always eaten my feelings but until Covid is over- my feelings are going to be all over the place, so this has to stop. I have made many jokes about weight gain, but that’s not the only reason I need to get it together. If I were to get sick with COVID now, I’m not healthy. I couldn’t fight it with everything I have. I took one surprising look in the mirror and said to myself “You can’t be like this. You need to be healthy.” This is my public announcement that I’m striving to take back my health. I didn’t get this way overnight and I won’t get unthis way overnight so I definitely will need encouragement because it’s gonna be a looooong road. I can’t carry around all this baggage AND all this extra weight. Also, I’m incredibly sick of the yo-yo dieting of my 20s and 30s. I’m not living my best life.

2. With all of that said… today I was having a little tête-à-tête with myself about much I miss working out and how the kids being home all the time is kinda going back to how it was when I was in the trenches with toddlers all day. I didn’t even try to take care of myself then, but that can’t be what happens now. It. Just. Can’t. I miss weight lifting and I miss proper hikes (without kids whining). I miss rock climbing and swimming in the summers. I miss playing at parks with my kids. But, I also miss our routine and our day-to-day lives B.C.- all. of. it. Guess what we aren’t getting back for a hot long while, if ever? That. I have never been good at acceptance and it seems as though most of America isn’t doing a great job with it either. I think I have done ok with the courage to change the things I can part, but I may have to tattoo the serenity prayer to my forehead.

3. The remaining 3 trampoline boxes arrived today. The UPS guy has probably wished a pox on our house because whoa boy those boxes were HEAVY. I have one plan tomorrow and that’s to erect the beast. I NEED this week to go more smoothly. NEED. I will happily sit outside all day and pay my requisite nickel to watch endless shows and routines. The recital costumes from the recital we aren’t participating in might even come out because why not?

4. For those following along on the ugly face saga: the antibiotics are working! My face doesn’t itch anymore at all and it looks less red and angry by the day. Hallelujah! Science is an amazing thing and antibiotics are my friend. I should also be getting my hormone panel back here in the next week. The medicine they put me on for my hair growth in places I shouldn’t have hair is already working too. I still have hair on my chin but I don’t feel like I need to carry tweezers around in a holster all day like it’s the Wild West. All good things.

5. Here’s a picture of Winnie sitting on the stairs with her little chicken leg tucked underneath her just because she’s cute. She still howls at everything instead of barks… part beagle or hound? Gotta be.


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