distancing day 172 thoughts:

1. You know that meme of Kermit running around flailing his arms in the air? That was me today- inside my heart.

There is a lot I really like about homeschooling but having 4 people yelling at me at the same time with their educational crises is overwhelming. Furthermore, I’m trying to teach math to 3 people and it is HARD for me to make it age appropriate. Why are we skip counting by 3s? Um… because we are skip counting by 3s. Also, the math curriculum doesn’t have a teacher’s guide or lesson plans so I have no idea how much we are supposed to be doing in a lesson. It’s very stressful for me. I even called the company and Terry, the person that called me back, was supremely unhelpful. I thought about telling him right where he could shove his math book with no guidance. Instead, I decided today we are throwing the math curriculum into the garbage can and starting with something online. I *can* teach math even without a guide but I can also let a furry fox or panda bear or stick figure that a certified teacher created teach it too and preserve just a tiny bit of my sanity. I’ll be setting that up and getting it popping this weekend if not tomorrow. Eat shit, critical thinking company Terry.

2. I attempted a nap today because I felt like I’d been dragged behind a garbage truck after schooling the masses today. Laurel and Marian were “not tired” and fought me to take a nap, but both later were unable to act like rational human beings which led me to believe “not tired” was a lie. I forget that their input is only their input and there output during school mostly only fires off at me. They probably aren’t as tired as me at the end of the day, but, frankly, dragged behind a garbage truck was a pretty generous analogy. I honestly don’t know how teachers do it. They are gods among men and should be worshiped or at the very least be paid well and have access to school supplies and hand sanitizer they don’t have to buy with their own money.

3. Other than school and not getting a nap, not much was accomplished today. School takes a loooooong time with all these people. I posted on Facebook about snow in the forecast for early next week. I initially was very displeased with the prospect of snow this early in September and then some sort of flying asshole flew right into my left eye today while I was sitting outside with the kids. I can’t tell you what kind of bug it was because it broke apart into a billion pieces ON MY EYE as soon as it flew into it. Nothing cheers you up like scraping flying insect guts out of your burning eyeball. What does that have to do with snow? I’ll tell you. Now I’m fine with snow because I hope it kills his brothers, all his friends, and his baby momma’s aunt’s cousin’s sister too.

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